Be My All
Written by Allison Christofi 14 November 2012
Excitement as I clutch the test
Joy at what I read
Knowing that there's life inside me
Not even the size of a tiny bead.
Stopping still I pause to listen
To the still voice I've grown to love
As it reminds me of the gift I've been given
Sent with care from up above.
With a pen in hand I write out
I dedicate my unborn child
Trusting God that every second given
Was before time set aside.
I realized that no matter the outcome
However much time - both great or small
God had a plan for this little life
And I wanted Him to have my all.
Never knowing, never realizing
The price that I'd be asked to pay
The pain that I'd be asked to go through
And the sorrow that there'd be on that day.
Still I pressed on, hope unending
Loving each and every kick
Sharing with my husband and family
Taking pleasure even while sick.
Watching as my belly moves
Playing with my babe inside
Pregnancy discomforts always present
Fade with the knowledge that my little one is alive.
Then the day came when all time stopped
For I knew that all was not well
The movements that I'd come to cherish
Stopped forever, and my heart fell.
Precious Baby, Jesus called you
Took you in His PERFECT time
I don't understand the ways my God takes
But His hands hold you, safe inside.
Took you from my womb to His arms
What greater blessing could there be?
That my baby will never know heartache
And will be with my God for eternity.
Pains beginning, my body aching
As I labour out of love
Knowing that my son is watching
Held by Jesus up above.
Born into this world so tiny
Every detail so intricately designed
Quietly laying in my arms, not moving
Tears of joy and sadness do my eyes blind.
Jesus take me and please hold me
The pain of letting go won't end
Please hold my Judah ever so tightly
And Your strength to my feeble body lend.
As the days pass and I live on
Never knowing all God's plan
Ever trusting, ever knowing that
Pressing on through Him I can.
For I'm learning as He leads me
However much time - both great or small
God has a plan for this broken life
and I want Him to BE my all.
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