It's hard to believe a week ago right now I was in labour, preparing to deliver my third child and second son. I'm so thankful that I have had the privilege of birthing three precious children, and that I have the joy of knowing that I have one child already waiting in Heaven for me. My prayer is that Judah's little life is instrumental in bringing my other two kids to Christ, so that I will one day share eternity with them, too.
Journal Excerpt:
"One week ago today, right now, we were enjoying our precious son, Judah, and taking in each precious detail of his little body. It's so hard to believe that it's already been a week. So many emotions roar through me. I wish and pray that I will never forget. That I'll never forget all the tiny details. That he always stays vivid in my mind even when years have passed. I never want to forget the memory of my son.
Desiree gave us a beautiful canvas photo of our family, and it's floored us. So priceless, and precious to us. I think having these reminders and decorations helps me with the idea of moving downstairs and away from all these memories. I don't do well with all of these changes. Especially when something painful has just happened. But being able to include Judah on our walls and reminders makes the idea of moving somewhat easier. Another thing that helps me with Judah is hearing how many people our stories have touched. Every time I start to feel pressured because people like what I've written, God reminds me that it's nothing I've done, but completely me sharing my heart and Him working through me. It definitely takes the stress off of me.
God, please use these events to forever change our lives, and to grow us ever closer to you and each other. Please remind me that each child and Joel are gifts, not to be taken for granted. You never promise how long we'll each have. While I pray that this is not God's way of preparing me to lose another, I do pray that He prepares me and works on me to trust Him more. Such a hard road..."
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